Fay's favorite five.

Hi Friends!

Here is your weekly dose of Fay's favorite five ~ a 5-minute or five-second thought from me, based on something I’m loving, learning, or exploring.

Feel free to forward it along if the spirit moves you.

This is the last email you'll get from me until after Chag, so I wanted to leave you with a handful of thoughts. Not the spiritual reminders - those matter so much this time of year, but you have plenty of places to find those. These are the mental health, stay-calm, stay-grounded kind. The ones I want in my own back pocket for the weeks ahead.

Enjoy, share, and reply to let me know your favorite.

1) On feeling the rain

Thoughts, feelings, and situations are like water.

When you drink water from a cup, it becomes part of you.

Rain is water too, but when it falls on you, it evaporates in minutes, and it's gone.

It never becomes part of you.

Similarly, when a difficult thought, feeling, or situation shows up, we get to decide:

Is this the kind of water I want to drink? Am I letting this become part of me, or do I let it land, roll off my shoulder, and evaporate like rain?

We'll always feel the rain, but we don't have to drink it.

We'll always think, feel, and notice the difficulty, but we don't have to internalize it.

2) On the cost of relationships

Being annoyed is the price you pay for community. It means having guests when you'd rather be alone. It means letting someone live with you even when they get on your nerves. It means showing up for events that you'd rather not go to. It means turning the other cheek. - Divya Venn

Fay's addendum:

This time of year, a lot of us are about to spend a lot of extra time with family. There will be beautiful moments, and there will be hard ones, and that's simply the price of community, of family, of love. For most of us, it's a price well worth paying.

3) On mental toughness

One sign of mental toughness is being larger than the situation. Do the circumstances dictate your mood and emotions? Or do you choose your mood and emotions, and the situation is simply something you respond to? The less your mood depends on your circumstances, the more mentally tough you are.

- James Clear

Fay's addendum:

The next few weeks come with a lot that's out of our hands. Mental toughness is choosing our mood, staying agile, and letting almost everything wash over us like rain.

4) On being unique

Rare are those people who use the mind; few use the heart; and really unique are those who use both.

- Rita Levi-Montalcini

Fay's addendum:

Let this be our reminder to be the really unique ones. Sometimes we're in an argument where, logically, we're 100% right, but the moment we let the heart in, it stops being so simple. Let's treat each other (and ourselves) with true compassion, the kind that comes from using the heart and the mind.

5) On remaining part of the solution

Much of life is in learning to always remain part of the solution rather than allowing ourselves to become part of the problem. - Jim Rohn

Fay's addendum:

When something flares up, the instinct is to ask how it affects me, who to blame, and how can I protect myself. All of that just adds flame to the fire. The better question is: What can I do to help extinguish this? How can I be part of the solution here? Sometimes that means staying out of it; sometimes it means giving in.

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Wishing you all a beautiful Shabbos, a K'siva v'chasima tova, Chag Sameach, and sending so much love to you and yours!

I'll be back in your inbox on October 9th, imyH!

Until soon,

Fay Brezel

Founder & Author

​OKclarity.com​

​Grow with the Flow​

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